today is tuesday, i like paper bags.
paper bags are not a great help to the environment at all. this is due to the overwhelming demand of paper, which surprisingly comes from trees, not monkey skin, which draws paper maniacs to chopping down trees and making paper out of them. this, however, is a great help to the monkeys as they are safe from being skinned alive, although attempts have been made to make paper out of monkey skin. nevertheless, the reason why people decided to use paper bags is because the plastic bags, which they claimed will save the monkeys and the trees, actually pollutes the environment when sunbathing, as they will produce a poisonous gas, more commonly known to the native paper monkey origami people as fart. this 'fart', as they claim it to be, can be used to melt brains, fry monkey skins, and even used to inhale as a drug. however, due to the overwhelming complaint from the native paper monkey origami people, this 'fart' has been banned, and replaced with helium, thus making the native paper monkey origami people unable to talk as their pitch would be made high. as a result, humans and monkeys alike think that the native paper monkey origami people are dead as they are unable to talk, which is absolutely wrong. the native paper monkey origami people have been known to bend and fold, and transform into other stuff, with the help of little girls who decide to help them. however, a few years ago, the native paper monkey origami people have been destroyed to make paper bags, like those we see today. this article is adapted from http://lltong.blogspot.com.
